Already Gone
by HeartBrokenBlood
Summary: What if Dimitri and Roses love didn't end so perfectly. A SongFiction about a failed love using the song Already Gone by Kelly Clarkson


A Vampire Academy Song Fiction for Most Part of Series

**Song: **Already Gone Kelly Clarkson

**Pairing:** Rose Hathaway and Dimitri Belikov

**A/N:** This is what I think is a good song for Dimitri and Rose if they never worked out and most parts of the series were they struggle to fight love and love at the same time. I will be writing this as if they never worked out and had to separate forever even though I am a full on Dimitri and Roza supporter. Hope you cry! Enjoy!

**A/N: **I also used most of the song but in the end two or three verses I cut out because I think it would have been repetitive and long. But you get the story anyway. Enjoy...again!

_Italics- Lyrics_

**Bold- Point Of View**

Normal- Story

**Already Gone**

_Remember all the things we wanted  
>Now all our memories they're haunted<br>We were always meant to say goodbye_

**Rose POV**_  
><em>

We were never meant to be happy. We were never meant to love each other. We were never meant to have some happiness or peace. Tears roll down my face slowly as I remember everything we wanted. We wanted love. We wanted peace. We wanted life. We wanted to be together. I turn my way from the mirror in front of me to look out at the window. It was twilight. The sun set and the view was beautiful but who knows what secrets it held. Just like Dimitri and I. we looked like mentor and student but no ones the pain of the two forbidden lovers we were. Now I real haunted by that love. The love we could never have. The love we wanted so badly. Now all I can remember is how we could never have that and I am always being hurt and in pain because of that. I just have to guess that we were never meant to be. That fate never intended us to love. That destiny never wanted us happy. We were always made to say goodbye. More tears stain my cheeks as I continue to look at the sunset then all through to midnight. The only thoughts on my mind were of Dimitri Belikov

_Even with our fists held high  
>It never would've worked out right<br>We were never meant for do or die_

**Rose POV**

I stayed there for hours just staring. Just thinking. Just hurting on the inside. For hours the pain took over as I thought over things. Like how even with our fist held high, with all our power and strength it still didn't work out. It never does in my stories. Not like the childish fairytales I hoped for. I realize now it would have never worked out right. We weren't those fairytales. We were simply hopeless lovers. We had no chance. We had no chance of a forever. We never meant to be in this life. I would have cried more then but I had run out of tears to spill. I kept thinking how we never meant to be. How it never went right but I had to hand us something at least. With all those things pilled against us we should have been broken long before we were. I guess that our strong but defeated love kept us alive that long. We were never meant to be and we were possibly never meant to try. We should have never tried. It would have saved us a lot of pain and heartbreak. It would have saved us many tears and time. We were never meant to try and now the truth sets in I dig up more pain in me and find some tears even though it hurts to have them run across my face again.__

_I didn't want us to burn out  
>I didn't come here to hold you, now I can't stop<br>_

**Rose POV**

From the same window I had sat for three days straight with no food or water besides my tears I stood for the first time. I was stiff and sore but I didn't mind because what's a little more pain added to an ocean of tears and heartache anyway. I started to walk out of my dorm even though it was how I didn't want this. I didn't want this pain only love. I didn't want my heart to break only to start beating for a reason. It was night and I don't know how no one noticed how I left but I walked all the way to the place Dimitri and I would train. I didn't even realize I was there till I felt the familiar mats under my feet. My body had taken me her without knowing and it killed me to see this place again. I promised I would never set foot in it again. Never again. But I found myself walking to the locker room. I sat in front of my locker and sobbed. Loud. I didn't care who heard as long as the left me alone. I know Dimitri said we should have never started to be together. He tried to resist it and he almost did if I didn't stuff it up and convinced him to love me too. He never wanted to love me or hold me because of the barriers but I did and then we couldn't stop. Only when we were forced to.

"It's my entire fault", I sobbed louder and the tears came faster than ever. Then I heard something. I froze. It was a voice. But not just any voice. The voice that should have made my heart beat faster but didn't. It only made it rip itself a part. I raised my self to stand… then ran out of there before Dimitri could follow or even speak to me. If he did I didn't hear him.

**Dimitri POV**

"No Roza, it is mine. Only mine", I don't think she heard me… Only my heart did and it made me suffer for it.

_I want you to know that it doesn't matter  
>Where we take this road someone's got to go<br>And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better  
>But I want you to move on so I'm already gone<em>

**Rose POV**

I froze for the second time that night. I had to go back. I had to enter the gym again. I had to go back to Dimitri. I needed to tell him that it doesn't matter. That he can move on. That he should move on. That he should not waste tears on me. Even though the words would be hard I also had to tell him to ask Tasha for her offer again. She would accept because she loved him too. I had to go tell him to go. Someone had to leave and only he could. Only he could find happiness on a different trail. One that I didn't involve in. I started walking back before I decided to run to hi. The draw was just too intense I ran, a full on sprint. I crashed through the front doors and into the locker room in seconds. I almost backed out and ran again but I knew I had to do this. Not just for me but him as well. He had his hurt and fun loving me. He loved me right but I had to let him go love Tasha now. "Dimitri..." I looked around the third row and bumped into him. I tried to hold it in I really did but I could not help but let one tear slip at the sight of him so close. So close for the last time. Then I began to speak.__

_Looking at you makes it harder  
>But I know that you'll find another<br>That doesn't always make you want to cry_

**Rose POV**_  
><em>

I stared at him before I fell to the seat. I looked down and my hands started to shake. I couldn't stop them. I held the both with the other hand but it was hopeless. I seemed to just look at them for ages trying to stop them twitching. Then Dimitri sat next to me. I could smell the after shave he always used. I could feel his breath on me as he took my hands in his. The stopped shaking but now I was turned towards him. Our knees were touching and I was surprised I didn't start to brawl my eyes out. I could just imagine Dimitri with little Dimka's running around and doing little kicks as the fell over. I could imagine him smiling and living life. That made it easier to finally tell him goodbye.

"Dimitri you should go to Tasha. You need to go to her. You need to start a family and be happy with her. I know you want to and you have to. Don't stick around here. Go be happy. Be a great guardian Dimitri. You have to leave the Academy and me Dimitri." I held my breath. A couple more seconds and I would leave. _One…Two…Three…Four._ I went to get up but was pulled down by a hand on my wrist. Dimitri. I collapsed back onto him before I quickly jumped back. That was to close. I couldn't say more if he did that. I held my chin with his smooth fingers and turned my face to his.

"No Roza", he called me Roza, my heart pumped in lost hope. "I love you I can't leave to be with Tasha. We can do something, figure it out and be together. We can do it", I knew I had to let him go with my next words but I couldn't. My throat felt dry and as if I had a lump in it. My breath was ragged and my whole body started to shake like my hands before. But I knew I had to set him free. To speak the words I envisioned his little cute kids and his happy face again. I knew right then what it felt like to lose another, to lose love, to lose the battle and to lose my life.

"I don't… Don't love you" my eyes were close to tears as I looked into his. I only saw hurt, pain and lost love but I couldn't back down. This was better for him. I looked at him one more time before I leaned in to kiss his cheek. I felt my lips brush his skin. He was frozen to the spot. Not even his eyes moved. He only sat there. His hand extended where it had been on my cheek. His eyes were lost and hurt. I had to leave. I ran. For the third time that night. Except this time I would never seen my one true love, the only man I've ever loved again. I was quick getting back and I simply flopped onto my bed. I had gotten here fast. My legs ached my I felt better focusing on other pain than the million knifes in my heart. At least those lessons spent running we good for something.

_Started with a perfect kiss then we could feel the poison set in  
>Perfect couldn't keep this love alive<br>You know that I love you so, I love you enough to let you go_

**Rose POV**_  
><em>

I stayed in my dorm for the whole day. I skipped classes and lay in my bed. Still. Never moving. The only think working was my haunted thought, my lungs and my eyes as they produced tears. I thought of the first moments. The first kiss. The sweetness and passion that went into it was mind blowing and it only made more tears to think of it. Then after that how it started to all fall apart and topple over. We were perfect for each other. But perfect didn't cut it. I can't believe it. Neither did love. I knew I loved him and he loved me but I loved him more to let him go. All I want though ids for him to know that I do love him, that I lied but I can't tell him. I had to let him go just like the tears that I let smear my face with salt.

_I'm already gone, already gone  
>You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong<br>I'm already gone, already gone  
>There's no moving on so I'm already gone<br>_

**Rose POV**

You're already gone and so am I. We're a part and it burns me. You can't come and fix it. Not now and not before. You're gone and I'm gone. It hurts to think about it. It kills to feel my heart breaking every second. It shatters. I know there is no moving on from this but I have to go on without him. I have to be gone from his life. After graduation I will be gone from this hurtful place where it all happened. I'll be already gone.

_Already gone, already gone, already gone  
>Already gone, already gone, already gone, yeah<em>

_Remember all the things we wanted  
>Now all our memories they're haunted<br>We were always meant to say goodbye_

**Rose POV and Dimitri POV**

_10 years later_

I remember being at the Academy. That's where I suffered the most love and pain. Nothing topped that. Not even the battle fields of war. That's where I had met my true love. When I think back to it my mind remains haunted by those moments. The kisses torched me. The practices killed me. All I could do now was try to live on. It was hard but I kind of did it. I had made it but shed at least a tear every day for my guardian angel. I remember that night we left each other. I guess we were never meant to be together. No matter how hard we tried. No matter how hard we loved each other. We never made it work. We were always made to say goodbye. Even though we still love the other. We were always meant to say goodbye… tears streamed down my face…goodbye…

**The End**

_**Written By HeartBrokenBlood **_

_**A/N:**__ I was perversely Eclipse_1901 but changed due to many reasons. Please read those stories if you want but read the alert first so it will make much more sense. And as always please review. I accept all reviews. Flame or good. Thank you for reading this one-shot._

_**Disclaimer:**__ I do not own Vampire Academy, the series or any characters. Anything recognizable is property of Richelle Mead besides the song Already Gone which is property of Kelly Clarkson _


End file.
